Friday, September 26, 2008

Lost

Today is one of those days that I feel like the worst mother in the world. I lost Reagan today at Kohles. It was horrible. WE had gone to meet her new preschool teacher (we are giving it another shot at a different school) and then we went to this park that Reagan loves so much. Since the park is right by Kohles I decided to run in and check to see if they had any tennis shoes for Reagan. I put Brody in the Baby Bjorn on me and put Reagan and a bag of goldfish in the cart. Usually a snack will keep her occupied just long enough to do what I need to and then she is ready to get out. Well the carts at Kohls are kind of like strollers, not regular shopping carts and I literally turned around to check for her size in the shoe I was looking at and when I turned back she was already gone. No biggie so far...she likes to hide under the clothes racks but usually she stays pretty close so I started looking for her. I am calling her name being a little silly, saying things like "Ok well mommy is leaving you now" to which she usually comes running saying "Nooooo" but this time I get nothing. I can feel my heart beating faster as I walk back and forth calling her name wondering where in the heck she has managed to run off to. She couldnt have gone that far.
A nice lady obviously can see the panic in my eyes and asks if I need some help. I tell her I cant find my daughter and explain what she is wearing, what her name is, and what she looks like. At this point I have tears streaming down my face because over 5 minutes have gone by and I cant find her. Several other nice women (who were shoppers) start coming over to me and asking if I have let the manager know so they can announce it over the loud speaker and asking questions trying to help. I am on the verge of being hysterical when I hear someone say "There she is." I walk around the corner and there is Reagan with a huge smile on her face with two glittery pink purses on her arm. She looks at me and says "Purse mommy." I walk over to her and literally sit down in the middle of Kohls and start sobbing as I am holding Reagan in my arms. I couldnt even speak, I couldnt even get mad at her or explain to her that she cant run away from me like that, all I could do was cry and hold her. After a few minutes of regaining my composure Reagan puts her hand on my face and says "Mommy cry, sorry."
It was an awful outing and I cant even think about it without tearing up. I dont know that I have ever been so scared. I think for a while, I will save the things I need to do like that for days when I have a babysitter. Thank goodness everything was alright.

1 comment:

shelley said...

i seriously cried reading this post. that has got to be a mother's worst fear. i'm so glad everything was ok. i would have done the same as you - sat on the floor and cried when i found her. shaelyn is so fast i keep waiting for this day to happen to me.

thanks for the updates on the school. that sounds SO frustrating. hopefully this new school will be better. and it was probably nice to see that reagan wasn't the little hellion the teachers made her out to be. like you said, she's TWO!!!